Let’s catch us a flight to a village in Wales named Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch. We’ll see all the sites, and return with tall tales of Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch.
I’d say let’s write verse, but I doubt there’s a rhyme for Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch. So as we traverse, let’s be poets in mime in Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch.
One Man’s Play is His Neighbor’s Labor (a poem of silly American English spellings)
He would have / should have chopped some wood and would have, if he only could. A livelihood of chopping wood would likely be misunderstood by those who live in his neighborhood whose labor for their livelihood feels more like floating on driftwood. He noted that their income’s good, not having fought for what they’ve got (a yacht named “We Just Tied the Knot”) which left him fraught with just one thought atop his head like a 60-watt: That someone surely chopped the wood that made his neighbor’s fancy yacht, which now he knew was headed straight for the passage known as Taiwan Strait. And as they cruised, his thoughts defused, and then he snoozed, quite unamused. And then he bought a nice hot brat, and gave it not another thought.
ood and ould make the same vowel sound: would, wood, could, should, good, livelihood, driftwood, neighborhood, understood
a, ai, ay, ait, aight, ey, and eigh make the same vowel sound: play, straight, Strait, labor, they, neighbor
o, a, augh, ough, ach, ot, and att make the same vowel sound: chopped, on, got, not, knot, hot, yacht, fraught, bought, thought, atop, watt, brat
live and live make a different vowel sound in these words: live, and livelihood
ote and oat make the same vowel sound: note, float
not and knot sound the same
u, ui, ew, and oo make the same vowel sound: knew, cruise, defuse, snooze, amuse
defuse, snooze, cruise, and amuse also all make the z sound
The e at the end of like gives the i its long sound, but not the i in live, unless it is the verb live (I need food to live) and not the adjective live (We are going live in 10 minutes)
The ai in Strait makes the long a sound, but the ai in Taiwan makes the long i sound. (In all fairness, Taiwan is not an American English word. wink wink.)
Bring Something to Share (Sing along!) Disclaimer: Just for fun. Not my family.😉 )
On this day of Thanksgiving, our fam’ly brought with us: All our hearts filled with thanks to be here.
On this day of Thanksgiving, our fam’ly brought with us: Two party lines Most with hearts filled with thanks to be here.
On this day of Thanksgiving, our fam’ly brought with us: Three basted birds Two party lines Many hearts filled with thanks to be here.
On this day of Thanksgiving, our fam’ly brought with us: Four kinds of carbs Three basted birds Two party lines Many hearts filled with thanks to be here.
On this day of Thanksgiving, our fam’ly brought with us:
Five Biased Spats
Four kinds of carbs Three basted birds Two party lines Some with hearts filled with thanks to be here.
On this day of Thanksgiving, our fam’ly brought with us: Six guys on sofas
Five Biased Spats
Four kinds of carbs Three basted birds Two party lines Some with hearts filled with thanks to be here.
On this day of Thanksgiving, our fam’ly brought with us: Seven women cleaning Six guys on sofas
Five Biased Spats
Four kinds of carbs Three basted birds Two party lines And still hearts filled with thanks to be here.
On this day of Thanksgiving, our fam’ly brought with us: Eight tipsy members Seven women cleaning Six guys on sofas
Five Biased Spats
Four kinds of carbs Three basted birds Two party lines Fewer hearts filled with thanks to be here.
On this day of Thanksgiving, our fam’ly brought with us: Nine knock-down-drag-outs Eight tipsy members Seven women cleaning Six guys on sofas
Five Biased Spats
Four kinds of carbs Three basted birds Two party lines And some hearts wondering, why are we here?
On this day of Thanksgiving, our fam’ly brought with us: Ten football rivals Nine knock-down-drag-outs Eight tipsy members Seven women cleaning Six guys on sofas
Five Biased Spats
Four kinds of carbs Three basted birds Two party lines And more hearts wondering, why are we here?
On this day of Thanksgiving, our fam’ly brought with us: Eleven players playing Ten football rivals Nine knock-down-drag-outs Eight tipsy members Seven women cleaning Six guys on sofas
Five Biased Spats
Four kinds of carbs Three basted birds Two party lines And the kids’ hearts all glad to be here.
On this day of Thanksgiving, our fam’ly brought with us: Twelve-midnight snacking Eleven players playing Ten football rivals Nine knock-down-drag-outs Eight tipsy members Seven women cleaning Six guys on sofas
Five Biased Spats
Four kinds of carbs Three basted birds Two party lines
You may not have guessed, but I can attest that the Midwest is blessed. And might I suggest your quest be to test if I jest in what I’ve expressed, lest your life be suppressed and you end up depressed for your lack of Midwest nest. I’m from the Midwest, and sincerely request that you come be my guest.
The once-mighty turkey is … slight. There’s not a potato in sight. The gravy’s spread thinner – More snack-like than dinner. The fridge was attacked late last night.
He says hi there; she says hello. “Which floor?” he asks. She doesn’t know. His finger waits, then starts to tap. Her face turns red. She thinks, “Oh crap. Why can’t I think? Just pick a floor!” Her brain congeals. He taps some more. “Just. Pick. A. Floor.” That thought now slips from clotted brain through tense, pursed lips. With sideways glance and impish smirk, he presses 12. (Joker? Or Jerk?) Long, silent ride can’t end too soon. It seems to take all afternoon. She ruminates entire ride, should parting words be kind? Or snide? She isn’t sure how this should end –
pictured words 